God of This City

This morning started out a little on the rough side. I was confused on our meeting time this morning so while I was enjoying a nice, leisurely shower, Parker informed me that I had 5 minutes to be downstairs in the lobby. Not the best way to start the day. I also slept terribly last night. As we were walking to our room about 2 hours past the time that I was ready for sleep last night, I was delirious in exhaustion. I started to think about Mary Elizabeth and how well I have handled being away from her. I’ve been so busy this whole week that I’ve hardly had time to miss her. As I was processing this thought, I hear myself thinking, “Why don’t you miss her more? What is wrong with you? What kind of mother leaves her child for over a week and doesn’t even feel sad being away from her?” I was so tired, seeing as it was about 1:30am at this point, and I was so confused by the thought process. Does it make me a bad mom that I don’t miss her more than I do?? This morning, I was talking to my dear friend and team leader Stephanie about how I slept very poorly last night. I kept drifting in and out of sleep, remembering only bits and pieces of dreaming about my daughter. As I was telling her about my thought process before going to bed, I started to cry. I do miss my daughter. A lot. I thought about how here I have been holding every baby I see, taking every opportunity to love on all the children at the church. It hit me that at home, I have my favorite of all of them and I can hold her whenever I want, without having to ask or worry about seeming like a creeper. Stephanie pointed out that I was being attacked with lies by the evil one. I knew it but it made me feel better to hear someone say it. After I pulled myself together, we left for the church and I told Parker what Stephanie and I had talked about. He too said that he felt attacked last night. He slept terribly, waking up in tears over nightmares about Mary Elizabeth. Satan knows where to get us and which lies we’ll easily believe. “When he lies, he speaks his native tongue, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” (John 8:44). He knows when we’re at our weakest too. Luckily, God is stronger. “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”” (2 Corinthians 12:9). Dear sweet Mari asked me "Como estas?" (How are you?) as soon as I saw her. I said "Bien," which means well. She looked deep into my eyes and said, "Are you sure?" I could tell by the look in her eyes that she saw straight through me, that I was not doing well. She took the time, even though she was in the middle of a dozen things, to tackle the language barrier of finding out the truth. I love her. And she just hugged me tight, like a mom would.

As the day went on, I started to feel better but was still overrun with exhaustion. We got to the church, cleaned up a little bit, and then sat down to have breakfast together. It was our team and some of the families from the church, sitting around a big table eating churros dipped in chocolate with Spanish coffee. So delicious and so fun. I've realized in the past few years that sometimes God will speak to me through songs. Not just in hearing them but a song will randomly pop into my head and keep playing over and over until I stop and think about the message God is trying to send me. It happened here the other day. A Chris Tomlin song popped into my head and I couldn't shake it. It is not even a song I listen to a lot or have ever really connected to before. But it was very obvious God was speaking to me through it. It is called "God of This City."The words are as follows:

You're the God of this City 
You're the King of these people 
You're the Lord of this nation 
You are 

You're the Light in this darkness 
You're the Hope to the hopeless 
You're the Peace to the restless 
You are 

There is no one like our God 
There is no one like our God 

For greater things have yet to come 
And greater things are still to be done in this City 
Greater thing have yet to come 
And greater things are still to be done in this City 

Greater things have yet to come 
And greater things are still to be done in this City 
Greater things have yet to come 
And greater things are still to be done here

When I finally stopped to listen to the words in my head, I was overcome with emotion. It seems like everyday here He is showing me more and more His purpose in bringing us to Sevilla. Greater things are still to be done here. As we sat around eating breakfast, I had the undeniable urge to play the song for everyone. I found a video on YouTube that had the lyrics and beautiful imagery behind the song. (If you want to see it, click here.) As we listened to it together, I could tell everyone was as moved as I was (though most of the rest of the group could control the tears a little better than I did!). Afterwards, Stephanie came up to me and told me that she usually prints out the lyrics to that exact song to leave with everybody at the end of the trip. Amazing how God works in the hearts of His followers.

The rest of the day we prepared for the concert that night and the game tomorrow. We got beautiful decorations and changed the church to have more of a coffeehouse feel. It was so comfortable and inviting. That night, David Be a (a well-known Christian artist in Spain) came and played for us. At first, I was really disappointed because we didn't have half the crowd we had hoped for. But as he sang and I looked around at who was in the room, I realized there was no reason to be disappointed. Aaron and Claudia were here, as were a few other families from English camp that don't attend church services here. Pepe delivered a beautiful message called Destinations, where he taught that direction, not intention, determines your destination. Even only comprehending half of what he said, I could tell it was making an impact on those seated around the room.

After the concert, we ate pizza and socialized with everyone there. Again, you could see that nobody was in a hurry to go anywhere. Parker and I left after about an hour and a half because we were so tired and we were one of the first to go! I just love the emphasis on relationship here.