9 weeks and 2 days

I've waited for this day ever since February 28, 2009 when this day take was taken from me. I lost my first pregnancy at 9 weeks and 1 day. I don't know why that day has stuck in my head so much like some sort of milestone but it has. Maybe just thinking about whatever developmentally happens at 9 weeks and 1 day. It just didn't work the first time. I know I'm not "out of the woods" but somehow I feel a little better having hit that first milestone. Last week, I had another doctor's appointment and he reminded me that very few pregnancies end in miscarriage after hearing the heartbeat at 8 weeks...which we did this time, just like last time. We got an Ultrasound again and although it doesn't look like a baby yet, I'm still in shock that there actually is a baby growing inside me. I also read that we got upgraded from embryo to fetus. Its not just a fertilized egg anymore or a clump of cells. Its actually a baby. Pretty amazing. Even more amazing, even though our baby is only about the size of a green olive, its little heart beats 150 beats per minute and its tiny eyes are already pigmented.

I still feel nervous but am growing more confident everyday. I even looked at cribs and bedding last night online. And speaking of growing, if I don't tell people soon, they're going to be able to tell from my bump! Sounds crazy because the baby's only the size of an olive but the bump is there! My clothes still fit fine because the nausea made me drop about 5 pounds over the last few weeks. I haven't had any weird cravings but I can't seem to sleep enough. I'm so tired all the time. My house is a mess and I don't even care because all I want to do at the end of the day is sit on the couch or go to bed.

I think the best part about today though is knowing that everyday from here on out will be new. Not that I don't want to think about the last pregnancy because I do want to always remember it and especially the little baby that's now with Jesus. I just hated thinking every time something happened, "I remember this from last time. This happened before."

9 Weeks